As the days passed, I hoped for magic powers..or only one power. A power which can make time stand still...or pass really quickly, sparing me the torture of being away from you. I held a straight face in front of you. I relied on pretenses to persuade you that I was alright..that I was not shaken by it. But the truth is, I was terrified. Every time I have to be away from you, it scares me to death. It's all the little things that I think of. It's all the little things that I'm going to miss. Like how will a day pass without me looking in your eyes? What will I do when I'm in a bad mood and I don't have your embrace to calm me down? It frightens me that in those few days in which we will be oceans away from one another, you would need me and not find me right next to you. So, I keep praying. I pray that you would be distracted by all the things that never distract you from me. Just for these few short days, I pray that you would be so busy and so happy with people other than me that I don't have to deal with your heartaching phone call that describes how much you miss me. You see, I can handle my pain. I can handle my longing to see you. But what I cannot handle is your frown. I cannot handle a temporary lack of happiness in your life. And more than anything in the world, I cannot handle the idea of not being beside you when all you want is only that.
P.S I will miss you more than you could ever imagine. But this, too, shall pass. So, let's just pretend we're alright until it does. Let's believe it won't kill us.